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Wednesday, December 7, 2016

12-7-16 Post: Criticism and Indecision


12-7-16 Post: Criticism and Indecision

Question/Comment: I find that I question everything and procrastinate because I am so afraid of making a mistake.  I find that I don’t do anything because I don’t want to be wrong.

Response:  It might be interesting for you to look briefly at your childhood to see if you were criticized or judged for making mistakes or not being perfect in some way. Then move on.

It is time to focus on the here and now. It is easy to suggest that you let up on yourself and allow imperfections. It is much more difficult to do it especially if criticizing and judging yourself is a lifetime habit.

An exercise may help get you past any fears that are blocking you from decision making or taking action. Chose something simple and not important to focus on. An example might be sweeping the floor. Then intentionally do it wrong. Maybe use a mop instead of a broom. Or, try to get the dirt into the dustpan with a shoe rather than a broom. 

The point of the exercise is not to get the job done, but to laugh and not care if it is done right or perfectly. Do the same sort of thing with another task. Maybe walk backwards or sideways to get from place to place. The point is to not do it in the most efficient or effective way but to give yourself permission to be creative and imperfect.

Keep practicing silliness and ineffectiveness until you feel the freedom of it. With practice, you can break the habit of perfectionism. It is the demand you place on yourself to be perfect that is keeping you frozen in inaction.


Friday, September 16, 2016

9-16-16 Post: Flow with who you are.

Question/comment:  I don’t know myself; I feel so lost and alone. Do you have any words of wisdom to help?

Response: You are not alone. Virtually everyone feels lost and alone at least once in life. Most people will set themselves aside to please or help others. We can easily get lost in fulfilling roles or expectations others have of us or we have of ourselves.

While helping others and giving to others is important, you are important, too. The feeling of being alone and abandoned may come from you having abandoned and ignored yourself and your own needs and wishes.

The key is to take time each day, at least once, to check in with yourself. Quiet time to go within is imperative to health and wellbeing. Here are some types of questions to ask yourself. 

Who am I really, at my core? How am I feeling? What do I need? What do I want? What am I running from? What do I choose to keep for myself and what do I choose to give away? How can I best take care of myself at this time? How may I also serve and have a meaningful and purposeful life? What is in my best interest? What is the deepest, most genuine part of me telling me?

You must absolutely take care of yourself and then give to others from your overflow of good, abundance and inner peace. 

However, when you have a child, incapacitated person or animal who is dependent on you, I believe you must absolutely meet your obligation to that being and do your best for them. The important issue is to do so without depleting or abandoning yourself.

How do you do that? Ask for help! In addition to checking in with yourself, ask for help. If you are overwhelmed or don’t have the resources to take care of yourself and your genuine obligations, ask for help. 

Changing your thinking will also lead you to less stressful, less dire circumstances if you find yourself in such a situation. It bears repeating, always check in with yourself. 

What do you need? How are you feeling? What do you really want? Are you fulfilling someone else’s expectations rather than following your own inner leading? 

Do you have positive expectations, do you believe that the needed resources and help will come? Do you believe that you can remember who you really are? Do you believe you can take excellent care of yourself and fulfill your life’s path?

Remember we literally influence the world around us from the smallest subatomic particles to the grandest expressions of life. What you expect is what you will see manifest in your life. So, what do you choose to create for yourself?

As Louise Hay teaches, loving yourself is the basis for everything healthy and positive in life. Facing yourself in the mirror several times a day and reminding yourself that you love, appreciate and approve of yourself exactly as you are here and now will assist you trusting yourself. When you trust yourself, you can know who you are and receive all the good life has to offer.

So, who are you? What do you want? What do you need right now?



Friday, August 19, 2016

8-19-16 Post: Boundaries

Question/Comment: I feel very frustrated and disrespected when people disregard my boundaries. It seems to happen often. It makes me wonder if I’m too rigid. Am I wrong for not letting others control my boundaries?

Response: Please be aware that the opinions in this response are just that: my personal opinions. If you are in danger or have been harmed by someone disrespecting your personal boundaries, please, get help.

Boundaries are important in all aspects of life. Boundaries exist everywhere from the boundaries of a cell, to the boundary that our skin provides for us, to the social boundaries between us, to the boundary of the atmosphere of our plant and so on.

Boundaries delineate the end of one and the beginning of another. Boundaries are necessary for healthful functioning mentally, emotionally and physically. You don’t go into detail about who is crossing your boundaries or how: so my response will be general. 

Beware of people who want to power push past your boundaries. Such a person does not have your best interest at heart and can cause you harm. 
There are those who command and demand that they be allowed to cross your healthful boundaries; these people are often psychopaths or sociopaths and intend harm for their own benefit or pleasure.

We each have to determine how much of ourselves to let any particular person know. This has to be decided on a person by person and situation by situation basis. It is very important to get to know a person in proportion to the amount and quality of interaction you intend have with them.

If, for example, you are interacting with a psychotherapist you have chosen and trust, then you would let go many of your boundaries during your therapy sessions. On-the-other-hand, if you have an interest in dating a person, you would need to get to know them, maybe even research them if possible and take time to find out what their behavior tells about them as you slowly and gently and appropriately allow them past many but not all boundaries.

Does a person ever drop all boundaries? Maybe. But, I don’t think this is healthy. Often people who are emotionally disturbed seem to be boundary-less or are unaware of their boundaries being crossed. Such people don’t know how to protect themselves or keep themselves safe. This is often true for children who have been severely abused and for the adults they become.

There is also the opposite situation, where people have very rigid and strong boundaries and don’t allow others to cross them enough to make friendships or form intimate relationships. This can also be unhealthy. As with all things the middle path, the middle range is more in line with mental and physical health.

There can also be cultural differences in boundaries. Our boundary for comfort regarding space between people can be very different between cultures. For those accustomed to standing and sitting within a few inches of each other, people from cultures who feel more comfortable with a foot of space between people will seem cold and standoffish. Those who are used to a foot of space will feel crowded by, suffocated by and suspicious of those who stand or sit within a few inches of them.

Boundaries also include what you are willing to do or not willing to do for others. It may be a kind loving thing to lend lunch money to a friend who left her wallet at home or give a meal to a homeless person. It may not be in your best interest to lend large sums of money to someone you barely know. Healthy boundaries are a way of taking care of yourself and loving yourself. 

Bottom-line, you have the right to set boundaries that suit your needs and customs. You, also, have the obligation to calmly let others know what your boundaries are and when they have crossed them. It’s good that you’re examining your boundaries so that you can decide consciously what’s appropriate for you at any particular time and with each person you come across.


I think boundaries need to be flexible and determined by self-love, self-care, compassion, and wisdom.

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

7-26-16 Post: I feel stuck. 

Question/Comment: I’ve been working for years on making some changes to my personality and it seems I’m getting nowhere. I’ve spent thousands of dollars and countless hours seeing psychotherapists, workshops and self-help venues. I feel that I have nothing to show for it. Is it hopeless? Am I hopeless?

Response: In most talk psychotherapy techniques, it is the conscious mind that is addressed. However, most maladaptive behavior rests in the subconscious mind. It is very difficult to make meaningful lasting change to the subconscious mind by addressing the conscious mind.

Techniques that use hypnosis are more effective but can still be more of a shot gun approach and still somewhat hit or miss. There is a technique called PSYCH-K that uses several levels of consciousness, uses techniques from hypnosis and establishes direct communication with the body as a mode of communication with the subconscious mind.

The resulting change is established much more quickly and produces more lasting results. Because the subconscious mind is usually out of our conscious awareness and operates automatically we have to approach it on it’s level. It also is the storehouse for every belief, every experience, every awareness we have ever had. 

People in general, especially children draw conclusions about our selves, others, life in general and our experiences of life based on our own emotional reactions and beliefs taught to us by others. All of these conclusions live in the subconscious mind unquestioned and determine the nature and circumstances of our lives. It is a bit like riding in a taxi cab with an unknown, unseen driver that we never communicate with. 

The driver doesn’t know where we want to go and doesn’t care. The driver goes where s/he knows best and ignores our wishes. The driver does attempt to communicate with us but not only do we not speak the same language, we do not use the same method for communication. We use verbal language; the driver uses sensations and reactions in physical form.

The driver takes us where ever s/he believes we should go and tells us when to get out all based on preprogrammed beliefs s/he has. Imagine standing outside the taxi, looking around, not knowing where you are or even how you got there because you were not aware of the whole process or what the decisions along the way were based on. You are still not where you wanted to go and have to try again to get there. 

What ever you were intending to do is repeatedly thwarted and you get unwanted results because each time you get in the taxi the same thing happens. That is really what it is like when our subconscious mind is in control and behaves according to beliefs that we either were taught, absorbed or formed in a nearly totally unknown process or in long forgotten perceptions.  Most people can with effort remember a time when something happened in their lives and they formed a belief that has been running their lives ever since. The conclusion reached and belief it formed may have even been useful at the time but may have long ago stopped being useful.

Just as an example, what if a child fell off of her bicycle and broke her arm when some of the other children were jealous of her new bike and began pushing her trying to knock her down. The child might draw the conclusion that if she has new, pretty things, others will hate her and hurt her on purpose. She might go through life never allowing herself to have new things or pretty things so others won’t hurt her. 

She might go through life buying second hand items, keeping things until they fall apart before replacing them and so on. The initial event might be long forgotten and even if it is remembered, the conclusion she drew from it may be forgotten or no longer associated with the event in her conscious awareness. It is still in the subconscious mind and is still determining her behavior.

This is an imaginary up example, but it can help explain the process of how we create beliefs for ourselves that then run as programs and control us for the rest of our lives unless we intervene and change them. The good news, though is that we can change these hidden beliefs once we have identified them. PSYCH-K is a very useful process for changing beliefs. It is not the same thing as psychotherapy; it is a whole different way of approaching self-change.

For anyone interested, learning more about PSYCH-K or finding a PSYCH-K practitioner the international website is: https://www.psych-k.com/private-sessions-2/


Saturday, June 11, 2016

6-11-16 Post: What is energy Psychology?

Question/comment: I have heard a lot about energy psychology. What is it? Is it better than talk psychotherapy? Should I try it?

Response: I can give you my understanding of this topic and then if you would like, you can explore it more for yourself. 

Energy patterns get stored in the body, maybe as attachments to the cells, maybe in the nervous system, maybe as holding patterns in the skeleton, maybe in muscle habits, or maybe all of the above. Energy pathways in the brain are definitely involved. 

Trauma can create deep pathways in the brain; repetition of thoughts and beliefs can also create strong energy pathways in the brain. Energy psychology addresses these processes and interrupts them allowing the person to choose more adaptive and useful habits and operating modes.  

There several different energy psychology intervention techniques; three such techniques are EMDR, Tapping and Reiki. Generally speaking, they work by interrupting specific unwanted energy patterns harbored in the body including the brain.

My suggestion would be to find a licensed psychotherapist who practices energy psychology and talk therapy and try it out. You may find a therapist who uses talk therapy techniques who works with and can refer you to an energy work practitioner. Usually talk therapy is needed in conjunction with energy work. In my opinion, energy work enhances and speeds up the process of talk therapy. 

Depending on the individual and the issues they have, energy work without talk therapy may not be advisable. There needs to be a knowledgable and skilled talk therapist available to you as a safety net and guide. Let me know if you find a psychotherapist that can help you with this and how it goes.








Friday, May 6, 2016

5-6-16 Post: Thought is everything in keeping our bodies healthy.

Question/Comment: I have some serious health concerns at this time and want to do everything I can to help my body heal. Do you have any thoughts on this topic?

Response: Cell biologists are aware of a section of our DNA strand called telomeres that are vital in assisting our cells to copy themselves properly to create new, fresh cells for our body. There is an enzyme called Telomerase that enables the Telomere section of our DNA helix to reproduce thereby enabling proper cell reproduction, and health and youth for our bodies. 

Life experiences can stimulate or suppress telomerase production. (See page 280 of The Biology of Belief 10th Anniversary Edition by Bruce Lipton.) “...stressful prenatal developmental experiences, childhood abuse (both verbal and physical), domestic violence, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), nutritional deficiencies, and lack of love all inhibit telomerase activity.

In contrast, exercise, good nutrition, a positive outlook on life, living in happiness and gratitude, being in service, and experiencing love, especially self-love, all enhance telomerase activity and promote a long and healthy life. (Blackburn and Epel 2012, Stetka 2014)

Lipton, Bruce H. (2015-10-13). The Biology of Belief 10th Anniversary Edition: Unleashing the Power of Consciousness, Matter & Miracles (p. 56). Hay House, Inc.. Kindle Edition. 

So, yes what we have done in the past may be negatively impacting the health of our bodies now (including the brain). And, also yes; we can do something about it. At the same time, there is no room for shame, guilt or blame in this line of thought as those emotions would contribute to suppressing Telomerase activity.


Thursday, April 28, 2016

4-28-16 Post: Jump out of the box and expand your idea of who you are.

Question/Comment: There seem to be a large number of people expressing prejudices about which human beings are superior to others. I think these are people who are unhappy with themselves and the lives they’re living but rather than take responsibility and make changes, they lash out and blame others for their misery.

Response: When we think of ourselves as separate individuals, when see others as separate from us, then it is easier to begin to make comparisons and judgements and place blame. No one wants to feel less than or at fault so we begin to find fault with others, blame them and sit in judgement of their perceived failures.

When we begin to relax our view of separateness and begin to see that we are all one human family, it becomes more natural to truly love and appreciates ourselves and extend that love and appreciation to others. 

There is less need to make anyone wrong and less need to feel defensive. With no need to compete for rightness and therefor superiority, it is easier to feel at peace with ourselves. When we do, then we find ourselves surrounded by peace and peaceful people.

We can take this thinking even further. We can realize that we are not our bodies. Every cell in the body changes over a seven year period so if we were our bodies we would be a brand new person every seven years. Really, since all the cells don’t suddenly change at once, we would be constantly in flux and never an identifiable individual.

So maybe we can consider that we are consciousness that attaches to a human body to have a human experience. When we take a further look at the human body, we see that we have the illusion that it is a single thing but it really is billions of cells that agree to band together to create a vehicle for us. 

If you can stop thinking of yourself as a solid, single package called a human being, it may change many things for you in life. Thinking of the human body as a cooperative grouping of cells is a very different perspective. (Please, see Bruce Lipton’s book The Biology of Belief 10th edition.) 

In this line of thought the body is no longer seen as one thing like a lump of stuff piled into a bag of skin. It is see as a vibrant, interacting group of intelligent, perceptive, choosing cells working together to form something together, a body. The cells cooperate and band together to form skin, organs, blood and so on which taken together forms the whole human body.

No one part can be missing without changing the whole. The behavior of every cell effects every other cell and the whole. Every part plays a vital role that every other part depends on and every part is influenced for benefit or harm by the behavior of every other cell. 

Just as every cell in the body has intelligence, perception, ability to react and a job to perform so does all of life. All life on our planet can perceive and react and has a role to play in the body and life of our planet. Animals, plants, rocks, humans, air, water, lava and so on all have a role to play. What one does causes ripples of effect in everything else. Together we are a collective that creates one being that we call Earth.

Do not cause harm to the cells of your body with things you eat, drink, think or do. By loving, cherishing and respecting the cells of your body, you honor their service, abilities, and grandure. What a miracle it is that cells choose to band together to form a body for you. Do no harm to others, human, animal, all others.

What happens to any one part influences every other part for good or for bad. Let’s adopt and expand Ann Marie Chiasson’s idea of sacred touch to include our words and thoughts as well as physical actions. Let’s use this intent in our treatment of our bodies and everything else on Earth including the planet. What a different world we would have; it would be a much improved world to inhabit.

Maybe humans could strive to adopt a life motto that reflects the Hindu concept of Ahimsa. “Do no harm.” Just imagine how much better off would we each be, how much better off we would be collectively and how much better off would Earth and all of her inhabitants be? 

Maybe we can let go of blame and judging and comparing and focus on changing our beliefs and behavior for the betterment of all.




Tuesday, April 19, 2016

4-19-16 Post: Disasters

Question/Comment: There are so many disasters and acts of hatred going on in the world. It makes me feel helpless.

Response: We never have control over other people. We can do the best we can with ourselves. It is important to volunteer to help where we can and as we can. We can also donate as we are able. Some of us may only have one bottle of water or one can of food to donate but that one bottle or one can could help save someone’s life. 

Just as important to volunteering and donating is loving yourself for doing what you can and spreading that love and appreciation to everyone who is doing what they can. You can even imagine the love you send out spreading throughout the world. 

Please, never let someone else’s anger or hatred squelch your love. If you can be a love generator as well as a do-gooder you will absolutely have a positive effect. And, if you are not able to volunteer or donate, the love you have for yourself and others will spread like ripples on water.


Monday, April 4, 2016

4-4-16 Post: I feel like a victim of my genetic make up.

Question/Comment: I see a bleak future for me when I look at my parents because of all the health problems that run in the family. I even see anger and substance abuse running in the family and I think I and my kids are doomed.

Response: “I realized that a cell’s life is fundamentally controlled by the physical and energetic environment with only a small contribution by its genes. Genes are simply molecular blueprints used in the construction of cells, tissues, and organs. The environment serves as a “contractor” who reads and engages those genetic blueprints and is ultimately responsible for the character of a cell’s life.” This is a quote from Bruce Lipton. Lipton, Bruce H. (2015-10-13). The Biology of Belief 10th Anniversary Edition: Unleashing the Power of Consciousness, Matter & Miracles . Hay House, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

I have often written that what we believe determines what we create in our lives. This applies to what we call to us from life and people as well as applying to our own bodies and the emotions we feel and express outwardly. Dr. Lipton provides us with a scientific basis for this idea. Our genetic make up provides us with possibilities at the cellular level and at the systems level which is of course composed of our cells.

When we follow a blueprint in building a house we can choose to follow it exactly or to make changes. We can ignore part of the blueprint or we can make additions that the original blueprint did not call for at all. It appears that the genetic blueprint we are born with is exactly like this. We can provide it with stimulus to activate one part of it but not another or we can activate both parts. We can also change this original blueprint by the things we expose ourselves to (such as chemical or nuclear toxins).

Our thoughts produce chemical reactions in our brains and in other parts of our bodies that then circulate through out the body causing reactions in each cell. No doubt you have heard of or read about the “stress hormone” coritsol that our bodies produce when we have reactions, thoughts and emotions that cause us stress. We also produce happy chemicals such as endorphins when we are relaxed and pleased. These chemicals then instruct the cell and tell it how to behave.

This is a simple and brief description of how we are literally in control of how our genes express; that is how they behave, what they do. We have control over what our lives will be. We do have control over our health. It can seem overwhelming to think we are responsible for every aspect of our lives and that can cause us more stress or even self recrimination for not being good enough or perfect. As Louise Hay has stated so many times, the first step is to love ourselves. Just focus on learning to love yourself and improving your skill in this area.

Depending on you and where you are in your life, learning self love and appreciation might be a process that begins with trying to find something, anything about yourself that you don’t see as detestable. The process can flow from where you are at the moment. Never give up on yourself. Let your goal be learning to love yourself more skillfully and more often. Even your definition of what it means to love yourself will be ever changing and deepening.

Allow yourself to blossom and receive love, appreciation and acceptance from yourself and others. Know that you deserve the best simply because you exist. Allow your good to flow to you and never criticize yourself for some presumed failure of thought, feeling, health or anything else.  Suspend doubt and float in a flow of good.

An idea that was often stated by Ann Barnett, as you fill yourself with love, appreciation and acceptance, that is what will over flow from you to everyone else and you will have an unlimited supply to share. That energy you exude into the world, will also attract more of the same to you. You will be able to influence the world and all of existence with your positive vibratory output. You can be the creator of your own good health and happiness as well as part of the uplifting of all humanity just by increasing your positive, loving vibration.

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

3-28-16 Post: Concern over world wide violence

Question/Comment: I feel very confused about all the hatred and violence in the world and wonder if we really are coming to the end of times. I don’t know whether to feel anger, hatred, compassion or fear?

Response: Could you feel compassion and reach for clear seeing? Anger, hatred, and fear are not useful for appropriate action. Which feeling do you prefer to have and which one leads you to the most appropriate action? Meeting hatred with hatred makes more hatred. Meeting violence with violence makes more violence. What do you want more of? Focus on that. If you want peace, focus on peace. Look for peace everywhere you can find it. Do you want more love and compassion in the world? Focus on love and compassion. Look for evidence of love and compassion.

It may be helpful to remember that you we are all one. We all emanate from the same source. We are all manifestations of energy. It is illusion that we are each separate individuals different and apart from other individuals. We share a common energy field and influence each other. Your thoughts influence others in an ever widening circle of rippling effects. Spread the thoughts and feelings you want the rest of the world to be influenced by.



Friday, March 4, 2016

3-4-16 Post: What is the meaning of life?

Question/comment: I have really been wondering what purpose life has. Does life have any meaning? 

Response: The answer to this question may depend on the beliefs and experiences of the asker. There are many different theories to answer the question, “Does life have any meaning?” We might also ask ourselves what our reason is for asking the question which might lead us to more fruitful answers.

Many people say we are here to learn; others say we are here to teach. I think that we all do both. It is nearly impossible to go through life without someone learning from us and we certainly learn from life continually. Is that the only reason we are here? This leads to a whole other line of questions such as where do we come from and where do we go to when we leave? Who set up this school, who sets the curriculum and who judges when we graduate?

Some say we choose our own meaning and this is probably true for everyone. We find meaning in helping others, in sharing, in expressing, in giving. From our own experiences, our reactions to them and beliefs we have learned from others, we decide on meaning and purpose.

Many make others the purpose for existing. Parents might make the well being of their children their reason for living; others might make a lover or mate the center of their world. Some people say their mission in life is to be a good person and spread happiness. There seems to be at lest as many reasons for living as there are people.

Add to that the idea that we may have more than one “mission” or purpose in life, and the possibilities are endless. A person’s mission or missions may even change over time. The answers to these type of questions have to be answered by each individual for themselves. 

Some say we are the Source expressing itself for the pleasure of experience and expansion. Some say the reason the universe is expanding is that the Source needs more memory capability as it’s manifesting creates more experiences.


I wonder if answering the question is unimportant. Maybe the question is a tool we use to guide ourselves to slow down and look within. When we do that, the inner guidance arises and the question is answered in the doing, the following of the inner leading. 

Monday, February 22, 2016

2-22-16 Post: Dissatisfaction

Question/Comment: I am never satisfied and don’t know if this is a fault or a blessing. Can you please share your opinion?

Comment: It is our nature as human beings to never be satisfied. We can also say that nothing is satisfied. Everything and everyone is in constant change. Have you heard it said that the only constant is change?

So if you achieve a desire or accomplish a goal and are already thinking about the next thing you want to gain, there is nothing wrong with that. It is also not imperative. If you feel good just resting, just being, there is nothing wrong with that.

If doing nothing with no desire to accomplish becomes a constant condition, that can be an issue and may be a sign of depression or fear. Out of being, resting, “doing nothing” desire naturally arises. This is the creative process.

Very importantly, not being satisfied is vastly different from lack of gratitude. It is very important to be thankful for what you do have and what you have accomplished. The next thing is built on the foundation of what you have learned, made, accomplished and the appreciation and gratitude you have for yourself, others, things, and so on.


You might even say you can be grateful for your dissatisfaction as it motivates you to new endeavors and new heights. It keeps you moving and expanding in ever widening circles. Is this any different that the universe or life itself?

Saturday, January 30, 2016

1-30-16 Post: Listening to your inner wisdom.

Question/Comment: There are always people telling me what they think I should do even though I don’t ask their opinions. How can I tell people to mind their own business without being rude or hurting their feelings?

Response: I’m guessing that if people are offering their opinions, it is because they care about you. Could you politely let them know that you appreciate their caring and interest in you while also letting them know that you have your own way of making decisions and choices for yourself?

This is a matter of setting and maintaining appropriate boundaries in a loving and kind way. At the same time, you might ask yourself if you are listening to your inner wisdom and following through with appropriate action in your self care and in your decision making for your life. What ever the situation, it is imperative to listen to your inner guidance and then weigh options and information with intelligence and clarity.

No one knows what the right path is for another. We each have to determine what our talents and skills are as well as the most joyful way to apply and use them in life. What is a right path for one may not be a right path for another even if they have similar goals, talents and skills. We each are unique individuals with our own soul directed trajectory.

It is also important to know ourselves well so that we don’t make choices out of anger or revenge or fear or rebellion. Meditation or some other means of knowing yourself is very helpful in this process. Know who you are and the emotions motivating your choices and actions. 

If you take a course of action because it brings you joy, you are probably right on track for your personal path. If your dread your life or some aspect of it, you may be off track. Listen very deeply to your innermost self and at the same time treat others with love and respect. 


I am not advocating abandoning someone you have an obligation to: I think there is always a way to work out the situation to meet your needs and theirs. And, in a relationship between two adults who are together by choice, when one changes, the other has the option of allowing that choice and embracing the new. 

Monday, January 11, 2016

1-11-16 Post: When do I have to consider myself old?

Question/comment: Everywhere I turn I get messages that I’m old. I don’t feel old and I don’t appreciate others attempting to limit me by their beliefs in old age. Although, I must say, I do appreciate senior discounts.

Response: Something I learned from Dr. Wayne Dyer’s 2016 calendar: Never let an old person inhabit your body. How you think will definitely determine how you live your life. If you believe you can’t, you won’t even try. If you believe you can, more than likely you will. 

Will you do a thing at age 70 the same way you did it at age 30? Probably not. That doesn’t mean what you do is not as good; it is just different. Leave out the criticism and judgmental attitude. If you want to travel, travel. If you want to dance, dance. If you want to start a new business or a new relationship, start it. No one can limit you but you. 

Accepting assistance from others is not admitting inability to function independently. If someone offers you help, take it. Maybe their perception of you as old spurs them to make the offer but accepting their kindness does not make you old. By accepting the offer, you are simply allowing love to come to you. 

You can even make clear to the person, that you could manage on your own, but it is so delightful to receive such a kind gesture that you would never turn it down. Everything is in the interpretation. Appreciation is everything.

If you feel youthful, you will be. If you love yourself, feel gratitude and take the best possible care of yourself that you can (physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and psychologically), then you will have a life of joy regardless of age. Let love, joy and kindness flow to you from you and others. Life can be more and more joyous the longer we live.


If your body has a difficulty it did not have at a younger age, love it even more. Take even better care of your body and be gentle with it. Don’t push and demand a performance from your body causing damage and pain. Lovingly appreciate your body for what it can do and focus on that.