12-7-16 Post: Criticism and Indecision
Question/Comment: I find that I question everything and procrastinate
because I am so afraid of making a mistake.
I find that I don’t do anything because I don’t want to be wrong.
Response: It might
be interesting for you to look briefly at your childhood to see if you were criticized
or judged for making mistakes or not being perfect in some way. Then move on.
It is time to focus on the here and now. It is easy to
suggest that you let up on yourself and allow imperfections. It is much more
difficult to do it especially if criticizing and judging yourself is a lifetime
habit.
An exercise may help get you past any fears that are
blocking you from decision making or taking action. Chose something simple and
not important to focus on. An example might be sweeping the floor. Then
intentionally do it wrong. Maybe use a mop instead of a broom. Or, try to get
the dirt into the dustpan with a shoe rather than a broom.
The point of the exercise is not to get the job done, but
to laugh and not care if it is done right or perfectly. Do the same sort of
thing with another task. Maybe walk backwards or sideways to get from place to
place. The point is to not do it in the most efficient or effective way but to
give yourself permission to be creative and imperfect.
Keep practicing silliness and ineffectiveness until you
feel the freedom of it. With practice, you can break the
habit of perfectionism. It is the demand you place on yourself to be perfect
that is keeping you frozen in inaction.
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